Until the day three years after he said goodbye to Kensington in the Ziggo Dome, Eloi Youssef releases his first single. A solo career was not his ambition. The first year after Kensington he made no music at all.
“Nothing came out of me for a year,” Youssef tells NU.nl. “Every time I picked up a guitar at home, I already knew after one agreement: this is not going to work.” After the hectic years with Kensington, the 38-year-old musician mainly decided to spend time with his daughter and his girlfriend Lakshmi (also artist). And he cleans up his house. “I gave away a number of awards to fans. I have disposed of a lot that I no longer wanted to keep myself.”
Ultimately, the basis of new music is created in his sleep. During dreams, Youssef regularly hears melodies, including those of his first single Unbind . “I often dream about very creative melodies where I would not soon come up when I was awake. Apparently they have to get out.”
“I only have to catch it from that dream and record it immediately at night. I used to think that I would remember it, but it turned out not to be the case.”
Youssef does not have an explanation for the creative excesses in his subconscious. “It sometimes feels like I’m in contact with a field in which creativity flows freely. But I can’t tell you what that is exactly.”
The text of Unbind is about letting go and surrender. “Surrendering to the moments in life when you think you’re completely stuck. And then having the confidence that you can get out of it again and learn from. The most intense periods of my life have always been the most educational.”
‘I dreamed of the farewell shows for months’
For the Coronapandemie in 2020, Youssef decides that he will say goodbye to Kensington, because he is no longer experiencing creative growth with the band. As soon as his departure is established and one album is made together, the inspiration flows again. Those songs are mainly about saying goodbye and let go. “Of course you feel some doubt with such a big decision, but it was clear to me what my path should be.”
The last shows with Kensington are hard. “There was a lot of emotional pressure behind it. The collision within the group was felt, because I wanted to stop and they wanted to continue together. At the last show I was euphoric, but I also left a lot of tears.”
“One of the most beautiful moments of my life was on the couch after the last show with Lakshmi at home. We sat each other in silence occasionally. It felt like a big moment where I had dared to let go.”
Processing the farewell costs Youssef months. “I was exhausted and actually pushed my body too far. I dreamed for months that I had to do those last shows again.”
In the meantime, Kensington has continued with singer Jason Dowd. Youssef has agreed with himself not to be too busy with that. He doesn’t want to compare himself with Dowd. “I recently saw a big poster of them with the new face. That may be alienating in the first instance. Similarly, that songs that I have always sung are now sung by someone else. That is just as strange. But if the songs in that new form can hit or inspire again, that is only beautiful.”
‘Sometimes the uncertain boy still comes to me’
Earlier this year, Youssef entered the stage again with the Orchestra Kamerata Zuid and the Nederlands Kamerkoor after times. The rocking guitars were replaced by many strings. “Suddenly I could use my voice much more freely. I even started singing a little lower, because I didn’t have to shout anything anymore.”
They are the first steps in his solo career, for which he has no big plans. “My only rule is that I no longer want to work from ambition. I would rather no longer work towards success that needs to be achieved in the future. I have done that for a long time and it has rarely been good enough. It often ended in disappointment.”
“Sometimes an ego-driven piece wants to come up with me, an uncertain boy who wants to be seen and prove herself. I try to look at it with more and more love and attention. Then I think: what does that boy need? I let that unrest rage through my system and with meditating or walking is it ready again.”
From September, Youssef will again visit Dutch theaters with Kamerata Zuid and the Nederlands Kamerkoor.
Exactly three years to the day after he said goodbye to kensington in the ziggo dome, Eloi Youssef is releasing his first solo single. A solo career was not his ambition. He did not make any music at all in the first year after kensington.
“Nothing came out of me for a year,” Youssef Tells Nu.nl. “Every time I picked up a guitar at home, I knew after one chord: this isn’t going to work.” After the hectic years with Kensington, the 38-year-old musician decides to spend time with his daughter and his girlfriend lakshmi (also an artist). And he cleans up his house. “I cool away a number of awards to fans. I cool away a lot that I no longer wanted to keep for myself.”
Anyally, the Basis of New Music Comes About in His Sleep. Duration Dreams, Youssef Regularly Hears Melodies, Including that of his first single Unbind . “I or Dream about very creative melodies that I would do come with quickly when I’m awake. Apparently, they need to get out.”
“I just have to pick it up from that dream and record it on my phone immediately at night. I used to think that I would remember it, but that turned out not to be the case.”
Youssef Has No Explanation for the Creative Outbursts in His Subconscious. “It Sometimes Feels like I’m in contact with a field in which creativity flows freely. But I can’t tell you exactly what is.”
The Lyrics of Unbind Are About Letting Go and Surrender. “Surrendering to the moments in Life when you think you’re completely stuck. And then having the confidence that you’ll get out of it again and learn it. The most intense periods of my life always the most educational.”
‘I Dreamed of the Farewell Shows for Months’
Youssef Already Decides to Leave Kensington Before the Corona Pandemic in 2020, because he is no longer experientcing creative growth with the band. As soon as his departure is confirmed and one more album is Made Together, Inspiration Flows Again. Those songs are mainly about saying goodbye and letting go. “Or course you feel some doubt with such a big decision, but it was clear to me what my path should go.”
The last shows with Kensington are Difficult. “There was a lot of emotional pressure behind it. The clash within the group was Palpable, because I wanted to stop and they wanted to continuous together. At the last show I was euphoric, but I also shed a lot of tears.”
“One of the most beautiful moments of my life was after the last show with lakshmi at home on the couch. We looked at each other in silence from time to time. It felt like a great moment where i had dared to live go of something important.”
Processing the Farewell Costs Youssef Months. “I was exhausted and had actual pushed my body too far. I dreamed for months that I had to do those last last shows again.”
Meanwhile, Kensington Has Continued with Singer Jason Dowd. Youssef Has Agreed with himself not to be too concerned with that. He does not want to compare himself with down. “I recently saw a large poster of them with the new face on it. That can be alienating at first. So Too Too that songs that I have always sung are now sung by some Else. That’s a bit krazy.
‘Sometimes The Insecure Boy Comes Up In Me Again’
Earlier This Year, Youssef Returned To The Stage After A Long Time With The Kamerata South Orchestra and the Nederlands Kamerkoor. The Rocking Guitars Were Replaced by Many Strings. “Suddenly I Could use my Voice Much More Freely. I just started singing a Little Lower, because I no longer had to shout over anything.”
These are the first steps in His solo career, for which he has no grand plans. “My only rule is that I no longer because to work from Ambition. I prefer not to work Towards success that must be achieved in the future. I have done that for a long time and it has rarely bone good enough. It of ended in disappointment.”
“An ego-driven Piece Still Somtimes Comes Up in me, an insecure boy who is to be so-to-prove himself. I try to look at that with more and more love and Attention. That is: What does that doe ea-westness that is what something that is what it and may that doe and sye let’s lobe ethy ethy ethy ethy ethy ethy ethy whatless Again with Meditation or Walking. “
Youssef Will Be Touring Dutch Theaters Again from September with Kamerata Zuid and the Nederlands Kamerkoor.