In the film Freakier Friday, the mother and daughter of body exchange. By standing in each other’s shoes, you automatically get more understanding for each other, the idea is. You can do this in real life to work on your relationship.
As a parent you can sometimes stick your children behind the wallpaper. And vice versa, as a child, you can sometimes find the choices of your father or mother incomprehensible. That that occasionally (or often) clashes is not so strange and belongs. But a little more mutual understanding in its time can be nice.
The relationship between parent and child changes over the years. If you are young, you probably see your parents as people who know everything. The fact that they had a life before you were born may not even come up with you. In adulthood you will automatically talk to each other on a more equal footing. You no longer need your father or mother to tell you that you have to rub yourself when the sun is shining.
Whatever the bond between you is, it is the unique relationship that exists, according to relationship therapist Cécile Schlangen. Up to the age of 25, children see their parents mainly as carers, she says. “Until then, as parents, you cannot ask for more understanding of your children.” That is only later on, if your children are also adults.
As soon as you realize that your parents are even people, with their own dreams, wishes and problems, that might help you better understand why certain choices have been made. That this will not work for that is not so strange, says lifelong therapist Phineke Tielenius Kruythoff. “Children quickly think that an irritation has to do with them, while it is often precisely previously due to previous experiences.”
Curiosity is important
If you want to improve the bond with your parents or with your children, according to Kruythoff, curiosity for each other is needed. Whether you get along well with your parents and see them regularly, or not. If you really want to get to know each other well, you must feel like starting the conversation with each other.
Take your time for that and wait for the right time. It helps if you are both open to that. Skip those difficult teenagers, Tips Schlangen. As a parent you have ever been young. In certain situations, that can make it easier to better understand the awkward choices of your teenager. Conversely, you will better understand your father or mother if you go out of the house, and especially when you have children for the first time.
Although in this society it is sometimes difficult to struggle loose from that parental care. For example, young people continue to live at home for longer. Not only because there are no homes available, but also because life is becoming more and more expensive and they do not earn enough to provide for their own livelihood. “That does something with the relationship,” says Schlangen. “It will develop less than when someone does learn what it is like to stand on their own two feet.”
It is never too late to improve the tire
And what you got from home largely determines how you are in life, says Kruythoff. “How your parents deal with you, the basis for how you treat each other and you with yourself. And it also influences how you deal with your own children later.” If you notice that there is still something wrong with your relationship, then it is certainly possible to improve that tire, even if you cannot literally stand in each other’s shoes.
In a sense you can of course: as a parent you have ever been young once. Think back to your own childhood and teenage years, and of the misses that you then made. And don’t forget that children have no room at all if they are still young. They only see you as a person the moment they themselves are part of society.
In The Movie Freakier Friday , A Mother and Daughter Switch Bodies. The Idea is that by stepping into Each Other’s Shoes, you automatically gain more understanding for Each Other. You can do this in real life to work on your relationship.
As a parent, you can sometimes get fed up with your children. And conversely, as a child, you may sometimes find your father’s or mother’s choices incomprehensible. The fact that this clashes occasionally (or often) is not so strange and is part of it. But a little more mutual understanding from time to time can be QUITE Nice.
The Relationship Between Parent and Child Changes Over The Years. When you are Young, You Probable See Your Parents As People who Know Everything. The fact that they already had a life before you were born may not even occur to you. As an adult, you will automatic talk to each other on a more equal footing. You no longer need your father or mother to tell you to put on sunscreen when the sun is shining.
Whatever the Bond Between You, It is the Most Unique Relationship That Exists, Accordance to Relationship Therapist Cécile Schlangen. Until the age of 25, Children Mainly See Their Parents As Caregivers, She Says. “Until that time, As Parents You Cannot Ask For More Understanding From Your Children.” That only comes later, when your children are also adults.
Once you realize that your parents are just people, with their own dreams, Wishes and Problems, that may help you better understand Why Certain Choices Were Made. The fact that this Doesn’t work before that is not so strange, sayes life course therapist Phineke Tielenius Kruythoff. “Children quickly think that an irritation has to do with them, while it is of due to previous experiences.”
Curiosity is important
If you want to improve the bond with your parents or with your children, kruythoff believes that curiosity about each other is a special important. Whether you get along well with your parents and see them regularly, or not. If you really because to know to know each other, you have to be willing to start a conversation with each other.
Take your time and wait for the right moment. It helps if you are both open to it. Skip Those Difficult Teenage Years, Schlangen Advies. As a parent, you were once young too. In Certain situations, that can make it easy to better the clumsy choices of your teenager. Conversely, You Will Only Understand Your Father Or Mother Better When You Leave Home, And Especiate When You Have Children For The First Time.
Althegh in this society it is Sometimes Difficult to Break Away from Parental Care. For Example, Young People Stay at Home Longer. Not only because there are no homes available, but also it is life life exensive and they do not earn enough to support themelves. “That does something to the relationship,” Schlangen sees. “It will develop less than some learns what it is like to stand on their own two feet.”
It is never too late to improve the bond
And what you have learned from Home Largely Determines How you stand in Life, Says Kruythoff. “How your parents treat you lays the foundation for how you treat each other and you treat yourself. And it also influences how you later treat your own children.” If you Notice That Something Is Still Wrong With Your Relationship, then It is Certainly Possible to Improve That Bond, Equally If You Cannot Literally Step Into Each Other’s Shoes.
In a sense, you can, or course: as a parent, you were once young too. Think Back to Your Own Childhood and Teenage Years, and the Mistakes You Made Back Then. And don’t forget that children don’t have room for that when they are still Young. They only see you as a person when they Become part of society.